Vegetarianism
by Wrath of the Deep
Summary: Meredy was a vegetarian, meaning she did not eat meat. And somehow, all the members of Fairy Tail in the guild hall found that absolutely positively horrifying. One-shot.


**This is something totally random that came out of mind from nowhere. Enjoy (I hope)!**

_**I don't own Fairy Tail, it belongs to Hiro Mashima. This is the best disclaimer you have ever read, isn't it? **_

XXXXXXX

They were fugitives, technically, but Master Makarov and Natsu and all the others insisted that Crime Sorciere join them in another celebration of the (somewhat) averted crisis with the Eclipse Gate, and the role that they played in helping a month ago. And since they hadn't been allowed to get into Mercurius on account of their social status, Fairy Tail was holding another party at their restored guild hall.

Ul had grimaced at that, the mention that Crime Sorciere had 'helped'. Meredy knew that she was remembering the Last Ages spell.

Meredy preferred not to think about that, too, and concluded that a party with Fairy Tail would be a good way not to.

Jellal had given in surprisingly easily. She had supposed, with a grin, that it must have because his _girlfriend_ would be there, surrounded by dozens of other _men_. Wink wink, nudge nudge, and even Ul cracked a grin and joined in on the teasing.

He had thrown golden light at her, after loudly denying his relationship with Erza (never mind the fact that Meredy hadn't said her name), and the three of them set out for the town of Magnolia by train.

The moment Jellal opened the back door discreetly and they slipped in the guild hall, Natsu had spotted them and gave a large yell. Meredy _knew_ that their blue cloaks did more harm at remaining inconspicuous than it helped.

"Hey! Crime Sorciere's here!"

That killed off Jellal's idea of going off to find Erza all alone while ditching the two of them. He was _so_ bad at hiding his plans.

"Juvia!" She greeted the water mage brightly, and gave a smile. "Long time no see!"

Juvia smiled back. "Juvia is happy that Crime Sorciere could make it! She-"

She broke off abruptly. Meredy followed her gaze as it slid past her and onto Ul, who was talking with Gray, a genuine smile on her face. She leaned against the wall. Gray, however, was laughing about something, scratching the back of his head. His face was also red.

She heard a low, menacing hiss. "**_Love rival_**."

Meredy turned back to the rain woman, only to find that she had disappeared. She chuckled awkwardly, not sure if she should feel bad for Ul or not.

...And Jellal was already gone...

Before she could decide on whether or not to spy on Jellal or save Ultear, somebody knocked her down onto the ground.

"Oh, I'm sorry," a girl with white hair and blue eyes apologized, helping her up. "I'm Lisanna, who are you? I haven't seen you around the guild."

"My name is Meredy," she said, dusting off her cloak. "I'm not a member of Fairy Tail, but the independent guild Cri-" Lisanna's eyes widened to the size of saucers, and Meredy swore she saw sparkles appear on her eyes as she squealed.

"Oh my gosh!" She nearly fell over again as Lisanna grabbed her arm and practically dragged her over to a table, forcibly seating her while she took the seat on the opposite side. "I never thought that I would meet you here! Everybody in the guild was always talking about how _great _you were! Apparently, you even saved my counterpart's life a couple of times!"

"...Say what now?"

Realization went over Lisanna's face. The girl visibly deflated, and then banged her head onto the table. Meredy sweatdropped. "I keep on forgetting I'm not in Edolas anymore," she heard the mutter through the wood. "Everybody's different. Jellal's not the lost prince-"

"What?"

"-Ultear isn't a notorious pirate-"

"_What?_"

"-and you aren't Fairy Tail's previous guildmaster that Erza Knightwalker killed..."

"WHAT?!"

A couple people turned to stare. She gave a sheepish smile, and turned back to Lisanna. She hissed in a low tone of voice, "Erza killed me? And I was _Fairy Tail's master?!_"

Lisanna peeled her face off the table and grinned nervously. "Umm, yeah?"

"Where and _when _was this exactly, again?"

"...In another world called Edolas..."

Meredy groaned. She had heard about that, she knew that it was a real place; the Magic Council had ordered an official investigation into it with inconclusive results.

"Hey, Lisanna!" A red-headed knight popped out of the crowd and sat herself by Meredy. She tried not to scooch away from Erza. "Listen, we've been talking about this a lot. Natsu, Gray, Lucy, and I would love to have you on our team."

The girl gave an apologetic smile. "I'm sorry, but I already teamed up with Elfman and Mira-nee."

Erza sat up straighter, looking curious, while Meredy tried not to move away even further. _Erza killed the me in another world-_

"Mira's returning to work? Huh. When do you suppose I could go fight her? I still have to repay her for the last time she punched me in the face-"

"Did somebody call?" Said Mirajane smiled a bit too politely as she seated herself next to Lisanna, grinning at Erza.

Then, they glared.

...Was she missing something here?

Mirajane broke it off abruptly and smiled at Meredy, who was more than a little unnerved. "Hello! Would you like anything to drink or eat?"

It was so random and out of place that Meredy scrambled for an answer. She had only been here for five minutes and already she was so confused that her head felt like exploding. And Jellal said that _she_ was the most energetic person in Crime Sorciere.

"I- uhh, I'm good on the alcohol," she finally said, while Mirajane continued to smile. "And anything's fine, as long as it isn't meat. I'm a vegetarian."

The moment she said that, it was like Meredy had flipped a switch. The whole guild went unnaturally silent. Everybody turned from their activities to stare at her, eyes wide and mouths agape, each in varying states of shock, all thunderstruck. A mage dropped their tankard of beer, glass shards shattering on the ground and amber liquid seeping into the wooden floor.

Erza looked positively horrified. Lisanna had a confused expression on her face, almost happy, and opened her mouth to say something, but then in an instant she blinked, and she looked positively horrified to.

Also, she did a spit-take with her mouthful of punch, and that nearly landed in the pinkette's face had she not ducked.

Mirajane smiled, but it looked a little more forced.

Meredy fidgeted in her seat, uncomfortable and nervous with the sudden absence of sound. "...Sorry?"

Somebody started crying.

XXXXXXX

"Here, try some of this steak."

"How about this chicken? It tastes delicious, one of Mira's best recipes."

"Nobody can get wrong with pork chops! Eat up, Meredy! It'll make you grow taller and stuff!"

"Don't be dumb, flame-brain, that's milk! ...But seriously, try some of this steak."

"Where's my fish? _Who took my fish?_"

"Look, I stole this fish from Happy just for you. You have to eat it _now_."

Meredy stared in dismay at all the various types of meat piled in front of her on the plate. She looked up, finding half of the guild staring expectantly at her. The other half was looking for Ultear, who had disappeared sometime after her conversation with Gray, and planned on 'punishing' her for not properly raising her and giving her adequate food, thereby apparently ruining her whole childhood.

They had screamed something that sounded suspiciously like, "Child abuse!" and ran off. Even Juvia had stopped ogling at Gray to join.

Everybody still at the guild was practically swarming her with pity. They leaned in as she opened her mouth.

"No thanks?"

Some fell over in disappointment.

"You need to get some protein in you!" Elfman yelled loudly, hurting her ears. And she was wearing earmuffs. "A real man eats meat!"

"I'm a girl..."

"How have you managed to live for so long without having the wondrous sensation of meat melting on your tongue?!" Natsu demanded as he took a chicken leg off of the pile and viciously tore into it with his fangs. Meredy cringed as bits of it spattered on her face. She wiped it off with a part of her cloak, disgusted. "Thish ish good stuff!"

A gloved hand whacked the back of his head, and Natsu started choking. Meredy cringed again. "Natsu," Erza said disapprovingly. "Eat with your mouth closed!"

She turned to Meredy, stars appearing in her eyes. "You poor child," Erza purred. The Maguilty mage backed up nervously, glancing at the door. "Have a taste! I guarantee you'll like it!"

She grabbed a steak or something and tried to shove it down her throat.

Meredy jumped out of the way as Erza crashed into the table, barely missing her. "Look, I really don't want to!" She cried fearfully, eyes darting this way and that.

The rest of the Fairy Tail members were content to watch, saying stuff like "This is for her own good," and "How dare Ultear brainwash her like this?!" For the record, Ultear _did_ in fact, consume meat, and only respected her wishes- holy crap!

Erza lunged at her again, right hand holding bowl full of some sort of chunky stew with unidentifiable meat globs. Meredy yelped and instinctively made a swiping motion upwards. A blue blade instantly materialized under the knight and shot upwards. The bad news was that it didn't handicap her like she wanted it to. The good news was that Jellal wasn't there to see her do that and strangle her. And also, _her sword frickin' hit it and launched the bowl into the air and it- she was so fucking dead._

WHY DID IT HAVE TO HIT _HIM_?!

Brown gunk dripped down Laxus's purple coat. Lightning started arcing dangerously in the air. Natsu, half dead, was getting the Heimlich performed on him by Happy. Everybody inched away nervously as a dangerous aura surrounded the air and his eyes glowed bright yellow, and a snarl grew on his face as he stomped towards her, ready to perform holy judgment. She swallowed the lump in her throat and started hyperventilating.

Then-

"Personally, I think that ham is better than all of that stuff you put on the table," Laxus said, glow fading from his eyes and grabbing the shirt of an unfortunate guild member and using that to wipe away the stains away, not sans guild mamber. He threw the bowl back at Erza, who caught it with one hand. "But I can't force my opinion on you, can I?"

He turned to look at Meredy, who was currently trying not to have a heart attack, gasping for air as she curled in a fetal position under the table. He frowned. "Are you okay?"

"NO!" She shrieked, all the emotions finally catching up with her, and the table exploding upwards and being impaled by dozens of swords. "NO, I AM NOT OKAY, ESPECIALLY _WITH ALL OF YOU TRYING_ _TO SHOVE DEAD ANIMALS DOWN MY THROAT_-"

"...Are you allergic?" Came a timid whisper from somewhere, interrupting her rant.

"Wait, you can be _allergic _to meat?" Natsu looked horrified, no longer choking. "Is it _contagious?_"

In five seconds flat, most of the dumber members of Fairy Tail had cleared out to the other side of hall. Meredy took a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. She was calm, this was not bothering her. She was the master of her emotions. Yes.

"So, are you allergic?" Mirajane implored cheerfully as she kicked open the double doors to the guild, a semi-conscious time mage draped over her shoulders, groaning. A blue-haired tattooed man shuffled nervously in after her, dripping water on the ground, while the rest of the guild that went out on their manhunt followed back in, some with degrees of wounds on them.

"Ul!"

She rushed over, emotions and anger draining away, gently taking her mother figure off of Mira, and helped her to a non-impaled-to-the-ceiling table and chair. "Are you okay?"

Ultear moaned in pain, opening half-lidded eyes to stare at her, focusing and unfocusing as she laid limp with half of her body on the table. "I think I have a concussion," she muttered. "I feel hungover and I haven't even had anything to drink yet. And Meredy, when did you get a twin?"

Jellal took a seat next to her, wringing out a corner of his cloak. A gallon of water came off of it. "Mirajane slammed a tree in her face, screaming something about 'child neglect'. I'm surprised she's still awake."

"Shut up, Jellal," she slurred. "Juvia dumped the whole river on you."

He winced. "Yeah, that. Right now, we're apparently Fairy Tail's prisoners," he informed Meredy, who could feel her eye starting to twitch. "What the heck happened?"

"They're all insane," Meredy told him.

"This is your punishment for your crimes," Mirajane whispered in a low, dark tone, and while Juvia looked more hesitant, she nodded, too. The rest of the guild nodded far more vigorously, except for Cana, who was passed out. "How dare you?! Repent!"

"Wha...t?" Ultear stood up, staggering. "What crimes? All we did was go for a walk!" She nearly fell over, until Jellal brought her back. He sneezed.

"You brainwashed Meredy," Gray said, narrowing his eyes. "I'm so disappointed in you, Ultear."

"And you! Jellal!" Erza yelled, a look of utter betrayal on her face. He looked at her, startled. "You too! How could you?"

"They didn't do anything," Meredy said, pinching the bridge of her nose and feeling like the only sane person in the world. "Look, it's not like the world is going to end because I don't eat meat-"

"Yes, Meredy, it's okay," Lisanna sobbed dramatically. "You don't have to hide the truth to protect yourself. We promise we won't let these... these _villains_ hurt you anymore!"

"Wait, they're flipping out because you're a _vegetarian_?" Jellal asked, holding up a hand. "And they think it's our fault? Lisanna, I thought you were a vegetarian, too!"

"Well, yeah, but it's different because- wait! I am a vegetarian! I guess I just caught in the moment... Heh. Sorry. Did somebody spike my drink again? Mira-nee..."

"Not saying anything."

"Right," Meredy could feel her headache. "You forgot you didn't eat meat. Okay. So anyways, it's supposedly a really bad thing-"

"It's not _supposely _("You mean supposedly, right Natsu?)," Natsu yelled from the other side of the hall. "IT IS! MEAT IS THE BEST THING IN THE WORLD!"

"Where are all the normal members of Fairy Tail when you need them?" The resident pinkette of Crime Sorciere groaned again, slamming her face into the table.

"Oh, the master took them all to buy some more food and stuff for the party," Erza waved a hand dismissively. "Said the rest of us lacked tact and destroyed too much stuff or something. So we're waiting for them, and along the line, I think I had three strawberry cakes."

"You mean _slices, _right?"

"Nope," she said cheerfully. "Three cakes. I feel particularly energetic! Don't you guys agree?"

"Uh huh, it's really weird..."

"I really want to jump up and down!"

"Cupcakes and rainbows!"

"No shit," Ultear muttered, eyes crossing. "You're all high on sugar or drugs or something. Meredy, Jellal, could you-"

"NO TALKING, PRISONER!" Mirajane screamed.

Meredy felt something snap in her.

"Don't fucking talk to my mother like that," she snapped, eyes blazing. Elfman (Lisanna was sheepishly rubbing the back of her head and still apologizing) leaped to his older sister's defense. "Hey! Don't talk to my_ sister_ like that either! And besides, we're trying to help you like _men_."

"You aren't!"

"Yes, we are!"

"No way!"

"Yes way! A real man admits defeat in the face of uhh, a real man!"

"How the hell is- mmmf!"

Whatever Meredy was going to say, which wasn't something very pleasant, was cut off as Gray took the chance and shoved a piece of meat in her open mouth, and forcibly closed her jaw before she could protest.

Meredy swallowed it.

Everybody waited with bated breaths, while Ultear groaned in pain and her head lolled on the table.

She tried. Meredy really, really did. But then her mind started rolling, as it always did whenever she ate meat or was confronted with it too much ever since _that _incident with the bird, and she remembered Zancrow and Kain and the _butter knife_-

She bent over to the side, puked, and then fainted.

XXXXXXX

All three members of Crime Sorciere lied in the medical bay of the guild. Jellal had contracted a cold and was burning up with a dangerous fever; apparently, he took a dip in the river at some point (Juvia looked guiltily onwards). Ultear was being treated for her concussion, the Master berating everyone who apologized as soon as they calmed down enough (turned out it was _Laxus_ who spiked the punch with stimulants). Oh, and Lucy was pulling Natsu's ears off, simultaneously apologizing to them as well.

Shadow Gear and the Rajinshuu looked like they were suppressing laughs. Laxus was off somewhere, pulling a disappearing act. Gajeel was smirking. "Not so tough now, are you?"

Meredy vomited, and the members jammed into the small room watched.

"Are you okay?" Wendy asked worriedly. "I mean, I can use some of my healing magic to help you, if that's all right."

"Quite honestly," Carla frowned to herself, floating in the air next to the young girl. "I've never seen somebody sick so much in such a short period of time."

"Meat," Meredy groaned, clutching uselessly at the metal bucket. "They shoved _meat_ down my throat. I'm a vegetarian," she clarified a moment later, seeing their curious glances. "A sort of side-effect of my linking magic; I can't really eat cows after knowing what it's like to be one. Or chickens. Or pigs. Or anything I've linked myself before to. _Don't _ask me why I've linked myself to them."

"There was also that time Rusty got a parrot and Zancrow dared you to link yourself to it," Ultear added, standing up, wobbling, before collapsing back down. "And then Kain, thinking it was a chicken, tried to stab it with a butter knife."

Meredy shuddered, long and drawn out.

"Hmm," Fried said slowly, rubbing his chin. "Sounds a lot like our Lisanna. Her magic is Take-Over, Animal Soul to be specific. So she's on a sole herbivorous diet, too." Meredy glared at said white-haired mage, who offered a nervous grin.

"Sorry...? I was drugged?"

She huffed in annoyance, but then she sighed, glare fading away. "Fine. I accept your apology."

"Yes!" Lisanna cheered, throwing a fist into the air. "Now we can be great friends and talk about stuff! Like the Meredy in Edolas! You know, where you were the guildmaster of Fairy Tail until Knightwalker killed you!"

Everybody stared at her, then stared back at Meredy, jaws dropped and eyes wide.

"Was I... Not supposed to say that?"

XXXXXXX

**Read and review, constructive criticism, all that good stuff please! And since they never mentioned who the guildmaster of the Fairy Tail in Edolas exactly _was, _I jumped the gun for the sake of the story...**


End file.
